My View on Marriage
To have a completely Christian marriage is to truly love Christ first. This means that we want to treat our spouse as if they were the most important, fragile gift ,that they are, and respect them totally. One of the ways to do this is by letting them be themselves, as individuals, and not trying to conform them to what you would like them to be. Christ made us all individuals. Jesus would not want us to change the plans He has made for that persons life. This is why it is so important to let your spouse be an individual first. Let God mold them. You should support everything they do, and need, or want to do. Of course there has to be understanding and discussions if you feel that what they do can harm themselves or your marriage. You can't be selfish and that is where people get themselves into the most trouble. There has to be roles, and a respect for each other in these roles. Husbands should respect their wives and wives, respect and obey ( I know that this word upsets many people) but yes, obey their husband. Christ asks this from us as our role as a wife. We should be proud of this. This also doesn't make the husband some sort of "glorified king" by any means in a way of abusing his role. This is just a respect for him as head of his household. If you make smart choices in regards for selecting the right partner then this can be a very happy way of life.
The Marriage is a covenant between two indiviuals with God for a lifetime together. The marriage is a sacrifice as well. You give of yourself to benefit the other and do it graciously and lovingly and without any resentment. The husband should provide for his wife a suitable home and a comfortable place to raise a family. This does not mean he has to buy his wife everything she asks for and give her possessions. He just needs to make sure that she is provided for adequately for her survival. He can harm her spiritually if he bases his affections on wordly goods and doesn't concentrate on her spirituality. The same is true for the wife. She needs to support him and take good care of him with love and gentleness. If God blesses you with children, then their spirituality is both of the parent's main concern. Of course their well being is not to be neglected and must be provided for. Remember also that your children are individuals and each of them is being molded by God. We have to allow for this as well, and take into consideration any harm they can cause themselves, and protect them at all cost.
We are all God's precious gifts and we should treat each other as He has asked us to. If things are not going according to His plan, then you need to change what you are doing. Your priest can be of great assistance in guiding you back on the right path. If you have never had the right path then anytime is a good time to start. This is not easy and probably the hardest thing to do in life, but it is necessary to the salvation of your souls and those of your children. Marriage is a serious covenant and not an easy one. If it is done correctly and in accordancce with Christ's teaching, it can be very beautiful and satisfying to ourselves and to God.
It is one thing to have a marriage, but another to have a truly Christ centered marriage. Not many find this way together in life, but to those who have, surely received a gift from God.